Maybe its just me but sometimes I find it hard following Jesus. Let me make clear this is not the Lord’s fault, not at all. The problem resides closer to home for me and all Christians. My heart and mind are selfish, looking out only for me and what will make everything easier and better for me. Like a child in a sweet shop I just want what I want. Only the things which will satisfy my desires are what matter!
Often I fail and fall. Patterns of behaviour which are not God glorifying easily take up residence. Sometimes I find myself thinking I’m not too bad, pretty decent actually. Other times I find myself sad and wondering why am I doing X or Y? No matter the circumstances when we get into the place where we are self absorbed then all we will do is find justification for our chosen pattern of behaviour.
The beauty of the gospel of Jesus is far greater than this though. It does not try to cover up the reality that we struggle with life and are often uncomfortable in our own skin. Christ goes deeper than any difficulty or sin. Lovingly he exposes our struggles and need for him to restore us.
In these moments, moments when we are frustrated and feel like giving up we hear the truth of the bible allowing us to realise that Jesus is “faithful and just to forgive us of our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9b). But in order to truly know this we have to accept that we have been acting like kids in a sweet shop. “If we confess our sins…..” (1 John 1:9a). We need to confess our sins to our Father through the saviour, Jesus Christ.
When we do so it is to his glory and for our good as we no longer are living in a daily cycle of self destructive selfishness. It may not feel like this as day succeeds day. But as time elapses and the months go past and the flaws in out thinking and actions go unchecked before God we accumulate for ourselves a suitcase full of hurt and difficulties whither we are believers or non-believers.
Each of us have specific things which we struggle with and certain sins which are exceptionally appealing. Stop and ask yourself what they are and when the last time you came to God confessing your need of him. Often I have found that it has been too long a window. Having resolved this I know the genuine forgiveness of a loving Father. I further wonder at the cost of the living saviour.
Knowing the forgiveness of God and the acceptance of a saviour is greater than any self absorbed indulgence you will ever experience.